Tuesday, February 24, 2009

so busy

i can't believe how much i've accomplished in the past month–and also how much i still have left to do. it seems like every hour of my day is filled with some admissions work, and it's all driving me forward, but i hope i have the energy to keep going through app review. i caught a stomach bug on sunday which really should only have lasted a day, but it was only this afternoon that i really began to feel well again, as if my body suddenly saw an opportunity to force me to slow down, and took it.

and yet, i'm sitting here, waiting for barack obama to come into congress to give his first state of the union address, and i had the sudden thought that, no matter what i have due tomorrow, at least i don't have half the worries on my shoulders that he does.

mrs. obama looks lovely, of course, and every time i see her i wonder what she's thinking. she strikes me as a reflective woman who sees a great deal but now feels compelled to withhold her opinion. it's something with her eyes–grave and warm at the same time.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

warm weather and dreams of spring

this is too much–how can i bear to go back to the cold weather that inevitably is in store for gettysburg when today was so gloriously warm? this whole weekend, actually, was just gorgeous, and i feel very happy in how i spent my time. i got to clean my whole house, and opened all of the windows to let in the warm, clean breeze–so much nicer than the stuffy, dry air we've been having lately which no doubt is not helping to contain cold and flu germs to individuals.

then i went to target (target! target! my favorite store ever! next to ikea, anyway...) and bought a lovely new bookshelf, a wall mirror for the front hallway, and some odds and ends. nothing is so wonderful as a trip to target after having been away from it for a long time. but my trip to barnes & noble on the way home afterward was strangely disappointing. it's like there's a stagnation there, which doesn't make any sense for a bookstore.

my dreams continue to be vivid and unsusual. i think my mind is fervently wishing for spring now. there's this place that i keep going back to, in several different dreams now, and it's almost like the connecticut shore, but i can't place where it is. i stand on something like a peninsula, with wide sunny streets and cheerful shops and suburban houses, and cherry blossom trees and very green grass. in one moment i'm at the end of the peninsula, where the streets fade into blue water that stretches out across the sound. in another moment, i look again and the street keeps going where the water used to be, and i know that i'm still near the beach, but the road that reaches it is now much, much longer.

i always feel slightly dissatisfied being there, even though another part of me is always at peace, content, basking in the sunshine, and i walk around picking the nicest flowers. in my latest dream of this place, however, i am on some kind of magic carpet that lets me fly up into the cherry trees to reach the blossoms that i normally can't. it's very freeing, and yet at the same time the nicest blossoms are always just out of reach–i pick what i think are the best, and then glance just beyond my fingers and see more. the game continues until i wake up, and i don't know if i feel playful or frustrated.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

25 things about me

1. When I was a little girl I wished to be a Disney princess—usually Ariel or Belle. Jasmine on other days. I still want all of their dresses.

2. I still make wishes on eyelashes even though it’s kind of silly.

3. I love, love red wine, especially semi-dry. And have recently taken a liking to Guiness. I am ok with white wine, and I hate rosé.

4. I’m completely terrified of amusement park fun houses—the kind where you sit in a little car on a track in a dark building and people in masks jump out at you.

5. I love Jane Austen and Star Wars and do not find them incongruous subjects.

6. I get my red hair from my grandfathers from both sides, but no one else in my family is an actual redhead.

7. I dream of things that happen in the future pretty much all the time and I hope it’s not odd.

8. When I was five I begged my mom to let me wear my ballerina tutu to school. Wearing it, I walked into my kindergarten class and announced “Who wants to marry me?” 3 boys raised their hands. I wonder where they are today?

9. Sometimes I wish I were an opera singer. And had the voice to be an opera singer.

10. As a baby, my mom changed my diaper on the lawn of Gerald Ford’s house.

11. The middle finger of my left hand is double-jointed and bends backwards in a way that disturbs people.

12. I love to write bad fiction, but wish it was good fiction.

13. I love britcom and Turner Classic Movie channel.

14. I think this “25 things about me” has become so viral because people love best to talk about themselves. This is the key to marketing.

15. I have never been to Disney World or Disney Land.

16. I talk to myself. Often. I hear that more intelligent people do that, and I am going with that.

17. I have a weakness for the Shopaholic book series, as well as Jane Austen spinoffs, despite my otherwise literary elitism. But no romance novels. Ever.

18. I have trouble sitting still or staying on one topic for an extended period of time.

19. I hate bananas. No–it’s not a metaphor; men are fine. Bananas are not.

20. Once I made my sister drive me to a 24-hour grocery store after midnight to buy smoked gouda. The man at the register tried to talk me up by using it as a come-on: “So, you like cheese, do you?” I do like cheese.

21. Captain John Smith was my great-great-great-great,etc. great uncle from my maternal grandmother’s side. Most of the rest of my family settled in New England in the 17th and 18th centuries, while the Swedish side emigrated in the 19th century to the Midwest (another good story).

22. I am the youngest of 7 first cousins on my dad’s side, and have been told repeatedly by my aunt that I “will always be the baby.” Even after I get a doctorate.

22. Men I crush on even though they’re old/dead: James Dean, Jimmy Stewart, Harrison Ford, Alan Rickman, that young guy in that movie “The Russians are Coming” who is no longer young.

23. I love music and sing soprano, play piano, and used to play the clarinet. My sister and I used to tour with a choir that went to England and sang in various cathedrals. I can’t remember if we were good or not, though.

24. I am cool with taking the name of the man I marry, so long as it’s not something like Mrs. Kiplefink-Panting.

25. My dream is to get my PhD in English literature and Jane Austen, and promote her sense of social responsibility in community-active projects.

Monday, February 2, 2009

18th century thoughts

i've been thinking recently.
• i don't really like sam richardson. i think he had no clue as to how women think. also, he had some disturbing fixations with s & m. didn't anyone else notice that in pamela?
• edmund burke was incredibly handsome. i know this has to be true, because fanny burney had a big crush on him
• if i could go back in time, i would "accidentally" have tom lefroy's uncle killed so he'd inherit everything and he and jane austen could marry. but only if i could be sure it wouldn't prevent her from writing.
• james boswell has to be one of the most unattractive men i've ever seen (at least in portrait, but if they can't fudge your portrait to make you look good, that's a bad sign)
• i think you could compare jane austen to star wars and probably find more similarities than you'd believe possible. ex: darth vader and sir thomas bertram: both bad parents who own slaves, who repent in the end and are redeemed by their children
•2nd ex: princess leia and all austen heroines: ridiculous amounts of time spent on styling hair

Sunday, February 1, 2009

football: a new frontier–wait, is 'new frontier' redundant?

incredible–a high of 45 degrees today, practically spring. i know this is a breath of warmth that always comes at the end of january only to dip back into frigid temperatures in february and march, but i couldn't help running around outside today and frolicking. it was so warm that i didn't even wear a scarf. and that tells you something.

now kayla and i are getting ready to go to a superbowl party...i guess i'm cheering for the steelers since she's from pittsburgh, and i don't really know anyone in arizona.

i never grew up in an area or with a family that cared about sports, so it's still a little foreign to me what the superbowl is or why people care so much. or how football really works. i wikipediaed it a couple months back, actually. apparently the very tall fork-like structure at the end of the field is only necessary for a very small part of the game. isn't that surprising to you? i mean, i've told people this before, but it seems to me like it's quite big piece of stationary metal to have on the field when you don't use it that much. football players should do something more exciting with it–like set up a spring board in front of it and take turns doing somersaults into the end zone.

but i realize that there is some very emotional attachment for some people, so i respect that, and i like eating barbeque wings and beer, so i won't complain today if there's some tv on in the background while i eat.

ha! i knew what 'end zone' means. snap!

it's not just for the classroom!