my friend monica is getting married!! another friend engaged. i am so very happy for her, and it doesn't feel at all terrifying, as it usually does, to think of a friend engaged. maybe because we're a bit older. maybe because i met her boyfriend and i like him. anyway, i'm more amenable to thinking of marriage in general as a happy thing, good for society as a whole and not always likely to end in traumatic misery, as most of my family has been want to display.
love and marriage–not just a mirage? maybe. i should let life show me that the scenes of my childhood are not the fate of the whole world.
2 comments:
One deplorable reconciliation I attempt at every so often relating to our family is that it all seemed like this incredibly needy, egotistical, melodramatic showdown every fucking day. Seriously. And we were these little social projects constructed from such shows.
"But you and I have been through that. And this is not our fate."
Sometimes I catch a glimpse of these actors turning an ear, looking for the reasons we did not follow, for a lesson on how and what is better. Sometimes theres room to make a genuine difference, even in your own solace, through these opportunities. Its a good opportunity to be generous and to teach. With all the filth in the world, we need to cleanse our own roots at every opportunity.
Whirled Peas..ccb.
sigh..i know. i do feel positive, however, about building different values from some of the things we grew up with..and it wasn't all horrible, but i definitely know what you mean.
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